Eric Covener’s Journal

Yellow Pages publisher R.H. Donnelley has approved a two-part “retention program” for CEO Dave Swanson meant to reward the chief executive for staying at the company as it tries to battle back from recent troubles
…
R.H. Donnelley’s stock price has fallen more than 97 percent in the past 12 months, closing Monday at $1.97 per share.

Shopping center cleared after brawl

In a news release Saturday morning, Raleigh police said at the brawl’s peak, an estimated 200 to 300 people were involved. The cause of brawl was gang-related, Raleigh police said.

Unfortunately, no homicides were reported. Ben Affleck needs to give these shopping-agendaless thugs a good talking to.

As high as they are, though, the new bills still aren’t enough to buy a loaf of bread. They can only buy four oranges.

The new note is equal to just one U.S. dollar

Once-prosperous Zimbabwe has seen an unprecedented economic meltdown since it gained independence in 1980, with the official inflation rate now at 2.2 million percent.

Can you spot me a trillion, I’d like to make a glass of orange juice.

What I was looking up: Randall Stevens is the name the finances are hidden under
What I found: Kevin Costner turned down the role of Andy Dufresne due to conflicts with Waterworld.

Southwest Airlines Says Family Is Too Unruly To Fly

When Ms. Slaughter’s flight from Detroit to Phoenix landed, she was met by police who escorted her and her family from the plane. Police detained the family, and explained that they were simply too unruly to board their connecting flight to Seattle.

Original, NWS but not so funny:

Jewish Edition that implements my entire yiddish vocabulary:

Via Phil.